


Mistakes

by HPFandom_archivist



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Angst, Explicit Language, First Time, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Romance, Self-Harm, Tragedy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-01-23
Updated: 2007-01-23
Packaged: 2018-10-01 05:06:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 743
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10181327
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HPFandom_archivist/pseuds/HPFandom_archivist
Summary: Everyone makes mistakes, but some are more serious than others. Harry/Cedric





	

**Author's Note:**

> Note from SeparatriX, the archivist: this story was originally archived at [HP Fandom](http://fanlore.org/wiki/HP_Fandom_\(archive\)), which was closed for health and financial reasons. To preserve the archive, I began manually importing its works to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in August 2016. I e-mailed all creators about the move and posted announcements, but may not have reached everyone. If you are (or know) this creator, please contact me using the e-mail address on [HP Fandom collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/hpfandom/profile).

**Disclaimer – I do not own or profit from these characters.**

**Warnings – character death,**

 

 

We all make mistakes, right? Just think back over your day and count up the mistakes you have made. Everyone makes mistakes, from simple things like buying ground Dragon's tooth instead of powdered, to big things like screwing up an exam or hurting someone you love.

Me, I've made the biggest mistakes in the world.

My first mistake was meeting his gaze to begin with. He was watching me across the Great Hall, and I looked up, didn't look away. His gaze is intoxicating; no wonder all the girls want him. His gaze called to something deep inside of me and I couldn't pull myself back from the abyss no matter how hard I tried. Over the next few weeks I met his gaze whenever I could, feelings passing like water between us, fluid and pure and unstoppable.

My second mistake was agreeing to meet with him in an unused Charms classroom, and this was quickly followed by my third mistake – kissing him. His lips captivated me as he spoke, sang a siren's song to my heart and I fell hard. We kissed, and it was glorious, like nothing on earth, soft and sweet and oh so right. He tasted of barley sugars and I plundered that taste, plundered his mouth with my tongue, laying claim to him as _mine_.

The fourth and fifth mistakes happened on the same balmy May night; we said three words and meant them, consummating them with our bodies. He was strong and quiet as he prepared me and entered me, his hair falling in his face in concentration, gleaming white teeth abusing his lip as we both fought to make it last. We were joined that night, joined heart, body, mind and soul as one entity, reaching for the Heavens together, both of us complete for the first time in our short lives as we moved as one. 

The sixth mistake was allowing him to take the cup with me. If I'd just been selfish, for once in my life if I had just been an arrogant, selfish bastard hell bent on winning no matter the cost, if I had been that for once in my life none of this would have happened. But I was predictable, I was chivalrous, I was me, and we both took the cup together.

My seventh mistake was the worst so far. The killing curse was levelled at me and I cried out his name. I cried out the name of the man I love, wanting him to feel the swell of my love for him, to buy him time to escape, to make him see that I loved him and I'd always be with him no matter what. I loved him, and I called out his name to the gods as I prepared to meet them.

I didn't mean to summon him to me.

I didn't mean to yank his body to me with subconscious magic, summon him to me tonight like I'd summoned him to me before, laughing and splashing as he zipped through the water to crash into my arms and lips, the spell playful and promising as we bathed together late at night. I didn't mean to summon him to me, to bring him to my chest and into the path of the curse. But I did.

So now I sit here, leaning on a gravestone and holding my darling, my first, my love, my Harry. Holding his body in my arms as tears paint my cheeks. I didn't mean for this Harry, I made a mistake.

My mistake won a war and lost a life. As I level my wand at my temple, I remember another, smaller mistake. I've left a tap running in my bedroom, in such haste this morning that I didn't spare it a thought. I pray that my mistake will flood Hogwarts with water, as my other mistakes have flooded my body with ice. If I'd just not made that first mistake, I wouldn't be here now. It's like dominoes, flicking the first one destroys all the others.

And then I make my final mistake. I under-estimate my love. The words are out of my mouth as green eyes flutter open, widening in shock and horror as my own close in death.

We all make mistakes, and I made the biggest of them all.

Forgive me, Harry, my mistakes.


End file.
